Causing Greatness in Others
When I think of influence, the first thing I think of is having an ability to cause another person to transform an area of their life which isn’t working or isn’t working as well as they would like and creating both the access and ability to do so that they didn't have before.
When influence occurs, it is something heard or seen which creates a powerful context to live by which touches, moves or inspires you to action in taking on your life and making a difference for yourself. When you’re listening to a speaker or video, it’s the powerful context you’re after in what you hear. You get connected to that context on a level so deep that it penetrates any concern, constraint or justification that would normally leave you paralyzed to act. With a powerful context behind you, action will naturally flow.
Consider that context drives your thoughts, feelings, and emotions, which directly drive your actions and ultimately results. Once you discover that context and you create it as a place to come from, results are inevitable, and performance skyrockets. For example, if I asked you to do something you said you would never do like skydiving, you would probably say no. The context at this time could be fear of the unknown or maybe falling. If I then said that I would give you a million dollars to go skydiving and you needed the money, you would probably go skydiving! Why jump? Context of money! Alter the context and alter your life!
Some people believe that a very effective way to influence people is through telling them what to do and how to think. I recently heard that Neuroscience has proved that the area of your brain that gets lit up when you're receiving advice or being told to do something, especially when it's not warranted or unsolicited, activates the punishment area of your brain and causes pain.
Even more intriguing is that the part of the brain that is activated when you're giving advice or helping someone out is the reward center of the brain and feels really good. Coming from that, it's very easy to see why most people prefer to give advice to others and tell them what to do because it's natural and feels good.
I invite you to think that the most effective way to truly influence people and make a difference with them is one thing and one thing alone and that is by sharing your life with them exactly the way it is and exactly the way it is not.
For example, if I want to influence someone to become coachable in Stegela as an access for them to achieve high-performance results in their business, I would share with them vividly a time when I started being coachable and began listening to exactly what Stephen said and the amazing results that were produced when I shut my mouth and followed his instructions precisely.
The reason why is because, in sharing your life, people get to see their lives inside of your life, and when you create a space of safety and love, people connect with you and you allow them to be touched, moved and inspired by what you say which can alter their context of life.
Influence to empower!
Alex Macklin is a Certified Personal Trainer and Yoga teacher in San Diego. He specializes in building strength, mobility, flexibility and rehabilitation with his clients. His mission is to empower people to their own greatness with strength, grace and passion.