Your Wife is Not Your Secretary

21-23 september 2018 | Jenna Lane missouri |

Do you run a business or does your business run you? Do you have a partnership with your spouse in business or are they an underpaid employee? It’s often necessary to delegate the tasks we aren’t the best at in our business to someone who can compliment our skills with theirs. The trouble arises when the person you delegate to is your spouse and they end up being your secretary instead of your equal.

When I was 18 I started my first business as a photographer with my wife. I am a very outgoing person while my wife is very analytical. In the beginning of our business we split the roles, I handled the sales meetings and shooting the weddings while she did the editing and the administrative work for the business. Soon I was asking her to set my appointments and I was no longer taking her input on the business seriously.

Our problem was that we lacked communication. We talked all the time - and fought even more - but we never properly communicated. She felt like I walked all over her and I thought I was running the business single handedly. We didn’t communicate our wants, needs, and feelings and we allowed the business to be what defined our relationship.

The definition of a partner is a person who takes part in an undertaking with another or others, especially in a business or company with shared risks and profits. A partner in business is very similar to a partner in life, in the fundamentals. You solve problems together, you brainstorm together, you struggle together, as equals in the shared risk of the situation.

1. Communication

Make sure that you create a safe space where you can be open with your spouse. You share what you want to achieve and allow them to share also. Encourage your spouse to dream big and to even surpass you with their success! Make sure that you don’t run over your spouse's dreams with your own.

2. Love Language

Read the book, “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. Read it twice if you have to. It’s important to understand how you feel most loved and how your spouse feels most loved. When you understand this, you can show one another how much you truly appreciate the hard work they do in a way they will feel it the most.

3. Delegation

Understand that delegation is important but your significant other’s time is also valuable. Would their time be better spent with you in a sales meeting or out selling their own business versus writing a blog for you or creating a social media post? Can the tasks you have delegated to them be better delegated to someone whose time can be traded for a nominal fee?

Remember, everyone has dreams of doing great things. Will you be the person to cheer on your significant other, or will you be the one who drowns out their potential?

Stephen Dela Cruz

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Stephen Dela Cruz is a best selling author, speaker and serial entrepreneur who specializes in helping budding entrepreneurs double their income in their first year. He’s built several 7 figure businesses and in his online school, The Mastermind Experience, he shares strategies around time and money management to help beginning entrepreneurs soar. You can see more about Stephen on his website and follow him on his Facebook page.